Happiness On Demand

Hello Reader,

Lately, I’ve been thinking about all the things I’ve had to do just to “maintain my sanity.”

I’ve gone through depression twice in my life.

I dealt with anxiety for years.

And during most of my career in banking, I was under constant stress.

For the longest time, I thought that was just normal. That this is simply how life is supposed to feel.

But it’s not.

Depression, anxiety, and chronic stress are not meant to be the default.

I just didn’t know any better back then.

And that’s really the point I want to make today: modern society does almost nothing to support a truly happy, stress-free life.

The way we live isn’t designed for our mental or physical well-being.

Not even close.

We are constantly fighting to maintain our mental well-being.

And the more I thought about this ,the more I realized something deeper was off.

It’s about the way we’re living as a whole... The pressure, the expectations, the constant grind… for what?

It all adds up.

The article below breaks down why so many of us feel constant stress, anxiety and depression in the modern world, and why it's not a personal failure at all,

but a natural response to the world we’re living in.

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The Modern Depression Epidemic

We are often told that depression and anxiety are flaws in our system: that our minds (chemistry or neural pathways) are somehow "broken" or "defective".

But that’s not true.

The human body/mind/spirit system is wired for health and happiness.

Yes, that is the default. When there’s nothing interrupting the normal functioning of that system, it defaults to being healthy and happy.

So why is it that depression and anxiety are more prevalent than ever?

My answer is simple:

We are living in a way that forces us to fight what we intuitively know to be true. We are “fighting against the current” of who we truly want to be. The modern way of living does little, if anything at all, to support our natural well-being.

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The "Learned Unhappiness" of Society

After fighting my way out of depression and anxiety, I found out that being happy actually requires very little effort.

That’s because happiness is our "factory setting”, the default state of being we are wired with from birth.

When we are children, if our basic needs are met, we are naturally happy. You can observe this. That’s the natural state.

However, as we grow, we are bombarded with "requirements" from parents, teachers, and society that teach us to prioritize external expectations over our internal values.

We learn that there are requirements for happiness, and of course, we start to believe that.

Therefore, most of our unhappiness (depression and anxiety) is actually learned as we try to fulfill these unrealistic expectations and chase happiness from external achievements.

The Education Trap: Learning "What" vs. "How"

Modern living requires us to study hard to secure a future, and going to school to educate ourselves can be a very beneficial thing.

However, problems arise when the model dictates what to think rather than how to think.

This creates a fundamental disconnect. When we follow the teachings of others instead of finding what we are naturally drawn toward, we abandon our birthright to create a life based on our own desires.

I like to call the modern education model “one-size fits nobody”, because it’s basically a “meat grinder” where we are being ground and pushed into the same mould.

In the process, we obviously lose parts of ourselves.

Parts that have meaning.

Parts that make us happy and fulfilled.

A World of Meaningless Pursuit

After graduating from “the meat grinder”, we are trying to build careers that we have no interest in. Not in the deepest sense anyway.

We all feel it: our jobs feel meaningless, we dread going to work and wake up already tired and stressed.

That’s because the jobs we have cause us to fight how we feel inside.

When we are forced to hold up appearances, we are constantly fighting our core values. That drains a tremendous amount of mental energy.

And at the end of the day, we expect our careers, money, or status to eventually "buy" us back the happiness we lost in the process.

Yet, we all know that it will never happen. No amount of external success—whether it's wealth, a dream vacation, or the "right" person—will ever bring peace and happiness if it’s lacking on the inside.

You Are Fighting Yourself

Modern living traps us in a state of chronic misalignment of our levels of creation. When we spend our days in jobs that don't align with our true inner values, we create "internal friction".

• Your Spirit (your intuition and deepest values) feels this as a sense of disconnection or even grief
• Your mind is forced to narrate a false story about who you are to just get through the day
• Your body is physically exhausted by actions that don't serve your true purpose and constantly fight who you truly wish to be

These three levels of your "internal operating system” thus become misaligned:

They are pursuing different outcomes, and the system begins to resist itself.

This internal friction causes your vital energy to leak out, draining your energy day by day, eventually leading to the heavy, cognitive "fog" we identify as depression.

The Way Out: Three Steps to Reclaiming Your True Nature

While we cannot reshape the entire global economy or change our societal structures overnight, we do not have to wait for the world to change to find peace.

You cannot change the world, but you can change yourself.

By aligning yourself with your true values, motivation, and dreams, you can stop fighting what you feel deep down inside and start living a life where happiness is no longer a goal you chase, but a byproduct of who you are.

To do this, you can apply my AAA (Awareness, Acceptance, Alignment) framework.

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Awareness: Uncovering Your Core Truths

Most of us are living according to "borrowed" values—goals given to us by our parents, our schooling, our social feeds, etc. To break this cycle, start by identifying your own "Core Truths."

List ten values that feel meaningful to you.

Then, trim that list down to three.

These are your non-negotiables, the three things you wouldn't trade for any amount of money or status.

This list becomes your "Internal Compass," the baseline against which all your life choices should be measured.

These are not just values you say you live by. These are the values that you follow intuitively.

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Acceptance: Forgiving the Learned Narrative

Once you see the gap between your core values and your current life, you must accept that you fell into the same trap as everyone else, adopting society’s narrative as your truth because it was the only map you were given.

Forgive yourself for the years spent in misalignment; you were simply operating in a survival state.

By accepting this past without judgment, you strip the old narrative of its power.

Forgiving yourself liberates your energy and gives you the authority to create a new life from this moment on.

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Alignment: Synchronizing Your Internal System

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​The final step is to align your levels of creation, body, mind, and spirit with your “true self”. Your “true self” is the “you” behind all the learned “truths” that the well-meaning but misguided teachers in your life pushed on you; Your parents, friends, teachers… the society as a whole.

Once you identify your core values and create a vision for your new life, you can start aligning your levels of creation with this “new you”.

As you align these three levels, the "internal grind" stops. Your life begins to mirror this harmony, and you begin to experience the profound joy that only comes from the freedom to be exactly who you are.

(I explain this process in detail in my book: IAM: The Inner Alignment Method)

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Change Yourself, Change Your Life

Ultimately, the modern epidemic of depression and anxiety is not a sign of a broken biological system, but a natural protest against a lifestyle that forces us to fight our own nature.

We are born with a "factory setting" of happiness, yet as we move through a societal "meat grinder" of rigid expectations and meaningless pursuits, we learn to prioritize external demands over our internal truths.

This creates a state of chronic misalignment that eventually drains our vital energy and manifests as the heavy cognitive fog we identify as depression:

a signal from our system that we are simply exhausted from the effort of pretending to be someone we are not.

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I hope you found this helpful. If you have any questions, let me know.

Until next time,

Think happy thoughts!

​- Atte

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