Happiness On Demand

Hello Reader,

I hope you are doing well.

I recently came across the Top Five Regrets of the Dying, pictured in the image above.

It’s not the first time I've seen these, but I haven’t thought about them in a while.

The regrets of the dying are what Bronnie Ware discovered during her time as a palliative carer. As she worked with dying people and developed close relationships with them during their last weeks obviously had a profound impact on her life. That impact led her to write the regrets into an article, which later became a best-selling book.

There’s a life-changing lesson here that I want to talk about.

Now, it’s obvious that we all have regrets in life. As Bronnie explains, we shouldn’t wait for a perfect time or ask for permission to do the things we really want to do.

We all know this.

But the lesson here is not just to “live full out”.

That’s great advice and a much-needed reminder that our time here on earth is limited and we don’t want to “waste” it.

The deeper lesson is about how a shift in perspective can profoundly change your life.

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It’s easy to see how during our late years we can take a look back at the life we lived and point out all the things we could have done differently.

Hindsight is 20/20.

The thing is... Hindsight really is 20/20, but even so, we rarely use it. The next time you catch yourself saying, “Well, it’s easy to see now what I should have done…”, take note.

The next time you find yourself in a similar situation, use the insight you gained the last time. You don’t have to repeat the same patterns over and over again.

This time, do things differently. Speak differently. Think differently.

And that brings me to the point: Hindsight gives you a new perspective. This new perspective allows you to think, speak, and act differently now that you know better.

We’ve all heard “change your thoughts, change your life” or “you become what you think about”. There’s truth to that, but you also create yourself and your life through words and actions.

A more accurate statement would be “change your thoughts, words, and actions — change your life”.

Still, that is not the whole picture.

You see, your thoughts, words, and actions are a result of your beliefs.

You think a certain way, you speak a certain way, and you act a certain way, because you believe something about yourself that causes you to do these things that way.

Your thoughts, words, and actions follow what you believe about yourself.

Therefore, an even more accurate statement would be “change your beliefs, change your life”.

I know you’ve heard that one before as well.

So how do you change what you believe?

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Now we’ve come full circle. I mentioned that the deeper lesson that the Top Five Regrets of the Dying teaches is how a shift in perspective can profoundly change your life.

Your perception — point of view — i.e., the way you look at things (life, yourself, your circumstances) determines what you believe.

To change your beliefs, you have to change your perception.

You don’t have to wait until the later years of your life to see things differently, even though life experience is one of the ways in which our perception changes.

Think about it.

Think back to your life when you were a child. Do you believe the same things now that you did when you were a child?

Of course not.

You probably believed in Santa Claus when you were a child. Your parents told you that Santa brings gifts every Christmas, so of course you believed that. You saw Santa, or even if you didn’t, you certainly saw the presents he brought.

Then you grew up. You started to become aware that there was more going on “behind the scenes”.

Like when Santa showed up and your dad just “mysteriously” happened to disappear at the same time.

Or how Santa looked suspiciously like your uncle, only with a beard and a deeper voice.

You became aware that there are billions of people around the world, and if Santa were to visit all of them, he would have to travel so fast that his reindeer and sleigh would burn due to the friction they would experience while travelling at hypersonic speed through the air.

Unless Santa is really a multidimensional being, capable of operating outside the confines of time and space and existing in multiple locations at the same time… (You see how this shifts your perception?)

So what changed as you grew up?

Your awareness.

You learned new things and, more importantly, gained new experiences. Your perception of life changed.

Based on this new point of view, you dropped your old beliefs because they were no longer serving you.

You get the point.

It’s the way we look at things that determines what we believe. Once you saw “the bigger picture”, you could no longer believe in Santa.

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Perhaps you picked up from that example that there is one deeper layer hidden behind “change your thoughts, change your beliefs, and even change your perception”.

It’s awareness.

Increase your awareness, change your life.

What you become aware of changes your perception. With increased awareness, you see more and more, a bigger and bigger picture of what’s going on in life, the universe… everything.

Becoming aware of more and more “secrets” of life allows you to change your perception: a new perspective (point of view) allows you to change what you believe about life and yourself. These new beliefs influence your thoughts, words, and actions, causing new results in your life.

In essence: See differently, live differently

That, to me, is the real lesson from the Top Five Regrets of the Dying.

Not that we shouldn’t have regrets, or not that we should try to live without restricting ourselves (even though these are very good lessons and worth thinking about deeply).

Try a new perspective. Increase your awareness.

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You know what the great thing about awareness is?

You are increasing your awareness right now.

Perhaps this newsletter made you aware of some things you hadn’t considered before.

“You know what, I hadn’t thought of it that way”.

That’s a new perspective right there.

Build on it. You can increase your awareness by, for example

• Reading
• Watching videos
• Taking online courses
• Talking to people (especially those with a different point of view on life than what you have)
• My favorite: Traveling. See the world. Get to know different cultures. Keep an open mind to different spiritual and religious views. It WILL increase your awareness and help you shift your point of view.

Last but not least: You can also increase your awareness and shift your perception by exploring your own truths and beliefs about life. This is done in silence and stillness, through meditation.

True meditation is just about relaxing your body and making it still, while “quieting” your mind (you can’t shut off your thoughts, but you can distance yourself from them). Sit comfortably or lie down, close your eyes, and commit to an inner journey for at least 15 minutes.

Give it a try. Your subconscious mind contains a surprising amount of secrets, including the awareness and the “big picture” that allows you to profoundly change your life... if you are open to it.

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In any case,

don't wait until you're looking back at your life to gain the perspective that could change it.

See differently, live differently

Until next time,

Think happy thoughts!

​- Atte

P.S. Have you ever seen one of those pictures where something is so perfectly camouflaged that you just can’t see it… until you see it. From that moment on, you can't unsee it. Of course, the picture didn't change. Your perspective changed, irrevocably. That's what it takes to change your life. Change your perception, and the way you think, speak, and act changes along with it.

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